Ask Mercer Boy

[J2thez929]

Dear Mercer Boy,

Why does everyone love you so much here at the Cafe?
How did you gain you important status?

-J2thez929

Am I really a "dear?"

I was unaware that people "loved" me...I guess I am sort of funny at times and attempt to get along with almost everyone I come into contact with. Not being shy about my loser status also helps make me an anti-hero with people.

I would say my status came from being on the Cafe dang near every second of the day for over a year, being looked to as some sort of "role model," and being a close, personal friend of the admins (and beating the crap out of them at whiffleball ).

I hear ya. And by the way, I didnt really mean "dear". You are not that special.. haha

[awwchrist]

Dear Mercer,

does my rash require the attention of a doctor?

Sincerely,

Whining in Washington.

[Mercer Boy]

Dear Mercer,

does my rash require the attention of a doctor?

Sincerely,

Whining in Washington.

Dear Whining,

If your rash is anywhere near your private areas, I'd consider getting that checked out. For other body rashes, try some cortisone.

If the rash you speak of is an "itching" for more football, there is the Arena League...but it may actually make the problem worse. Check out NFL Network and hope they pull out some old games. Otherwise, that rash is going to last a minimum of seven months.

[TTTBone]

Mercer Boy,
I'm one of those "tough-guys" who manages to never get sick, despite the odds.
I somehow managed to catch the first cold I've had in about a dozen years. I think I'm into full-blown sinus-infection creeping into throat infection (sinuses and throat just burn). 100 degree fever. I have friends here right now to watch the Illini/Badger game. I'm pretty looped after two drinks (which is just wrong), and my friends are telling me to stop "checking my email" and get in front of the TV. Should I be the good host and ignore my affliction, or let them know whats going on and try to keep my distance from everyone?
Game On!
Guess I'll keep my distance and let 'em know I'm not feeling so well around half-time.

[TTTBone]

Hah! My better half let 'em know the TripT-Bone is not quite right. Now, nobody will get within a 20 foot radius of me (including my lady). Quite the party.
Badgers!?! My best last chance before I take the NyQuil and pass out for two days.

[Mercer Boy]

Hah! My better half let 'em know the TripT-Bone is not quite right. Now, nobody will get within a 20 foot radius of me (including my lady). Quite the party.
Badgers!?! My best last chance before I take the NyQuil and pass out for two days.

Answering questions for me, eh?

I knew this thread would get less and less needed as people got the idea.

I rarely get sick either, but my colds always start as a sore throat. I normally don't get the fever thing, but the sinus stuff is always the worst part. I just wash my hands, cover my mouth when I cough/sneeze, and keep doing what I normally do.

Don't worry; I'd be destroyed after two beers as well, I'm sure (150 pounds and never drank in my life...nor will I most likely).

[VHawk15]

Dear VHawk,

How can I get someone like crmella (jeff's GF) to come in my bed thonight??

love, Mark

Well, start by spelling things correctly. A little bird told me that she doesn't like when people mispell "tonight." Secondly, start trying to act a little on the homosexual side.

And lastly, whatever you do, do NOT throw a football to any black guy.

[MCG321]

Mercer,

The doc said no
But I still wanna go
And play in Super Bowl 39
Am I out of my mind?

Always the poet,

TO

[Mercer Boy]

Mercer,

The doc said no
But I still wanna go
And play in Super Bowl 39
Am I out of my mind?

Always the poet,

TO

There once was a man named Terrell,
Dreams of playing in the Bowl he did smell,
But his ankle was broken,
The doc told him he was smokin'
If he thought there was a chance in hell.

[kanezfan11]

Mercer,

The doc said no
But I still wanna go
And play in Super Bowl 39
Am I out of my mind?

Always the poet,

TO

There once was a man named Terrell,
Dreams of playing in the Bowl he did smell,
But his ankle was broken,
The doc told him he was smokin'
If he thought there was a chance in hell.

Oh well,
that ain't swell.



Edit: mine was just plain bad looking back at it.