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by Mercer Boy » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:51 am 
Fanball via Yahoo! Sports wrote:Where's the flux capacitor? Portis stars in 'Back to the End Zone'
By JOSEPH WHITE, AP Sports Writer
October 21, 2005
ASHBURN, Va. (AP) -- With wild gray hair and weird black glasses, Clinton Portis looked like Doc Brown from ``Back to the Future.''
Really.
The flamboyant Washington Redskins running back topped himself at his weekly meeting with the media Thursday, wearing a huge wig and rectangular-lensed, sci-fi glasses that hung about three inches in front of his eyes.
``I didn't get my hair styled today,'' Portis said. ``I actually stuck my hand in a socket and this is the way it turned out.''
And what about the glasses?
``Going through my play book, I'm looking for the plays that can get me in the end zone, so I'm really trying hard,'' Portis said. ``Actually my eyes haven't been working that good.''
Did he realized that he looked like Brown, the time-machine creator portrayed by Christopher Lloyd in the three ``Back to the Future'' movies in the 1980s?
``You know, he figured out everything,'' Portis said. ``Like I told you, I'm trying to figure out a way to get into the end zone.''
This was the third time in recent weeks that Portis has sported unusual eyewear for his weekly chat with reporters. He wore protective goggles one week, then followed the next week with oversized, retro, mahogany-colored sunglasses because he wanted a ``Hollywood'' look.
So, is all this an attempt to keep a sense of humor, given he's yet to score a touchdown all season?
``Well,'' Portis said, ``I might as well keep a sense of humor because if I leave it up to you all, you're going to run me into the ground, drive me crazy. The last two weeks we haven't won, so now it's becoming a problem. When you're winning, it really don't matter, but when you're not winning, it becomes a problem. We've lost our last two games, and I've got to find a way to get in the end zone.''
The Redskins (3-2) haven't scored a rushing TD this year. Portis hasn't scored one in seven games. That's a change of pace for a player who scored 29 in two seasons with Denver before coming to Washington.
Portis also has only one run of 21 yards or longer, and he's been banged up the last couple of weeks. He didn't practice Wednesday or Thursday with a sore calf, but he's not yet ready to sit out a game. He's listed as probable for Sunday's game against the San Francisco 49ers.
``Everybody wants to sit out and heal up, but you want to be on the field with your teammates,'' Portis said. ``We've got something good going on with this organization right now. I really don't want to miss that. I feel like they need me out there, and I feel like, even with my injury, I can do enough, so I want to be out there.''
Meanwhile, back to the hair. Say, Clinton, do you suppose you can get quarterback Mark Brunell to wear a wig?
``He actually has on a wig now,'' Portis said. ``You thought that was his hair. He's actually gone bald at the top.''
I got this screenshot from the Redskins official site...
BAHAHAHAHA! Portis freaking rules.
