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A Day in Hell...a joke

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A Day in Hell...a joke

Postby Omaha Red Sox » Thu Feb 16, 2006 10:37 am

A Day in Hell
One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...

Demon: Why so glum chum?
Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy: Wow...that's...awesome!

Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.

Demon: You into drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!

Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uh no.

Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.
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Postby knapplc » Thu Feb 16, 2006 10:41 am

Yeah, but he'll be so wasted from Thursday that Fridays will just be a blur...











Post # 1984 - Great book by Orwell!
Last edited by knapplc on Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Omaha Red Sox » Thu Feb 16, 2006 10:50 am

knapplc wrote:Yeah, but he'll be so wasted from Thursday that Fridays will just be a blur...


Somehow, that just wouldn't make me feel any better about the situation. :~(
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Postby Redskins Win » Thu Feb 16, 2006 10:59 am

Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Isn't Tab already considered "diet"?
That ruined it for me :-t
Last edited by Redskins Win on Thu Feb 16, 2006 3:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Tiki » Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:47 am

Haha reminds me of a Notorious Big song Suicidal thoughts. Good joke! ;-D
Keep it lit.
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Postby UTLonghorns » Thu Feb 16, 2006 5:12 pm

Haha, thats great.
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Postby onnestabe » Thu Feb 16, 2006 5:39 pm

Redskins Win wrote:
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Isn't Tab already considered "diet"?
That ruined it for me :-t


wow...could you have picked a more inconsequential part to focus on? ;-)
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Postby Wizzle » Thu Feb 16, 2006 6:28 pm

onnestabe wrote:
Redskins Win wrote:
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Isn't Tab already considered "diet"?
That ruined it for me :-t


wow...could you have picked a more inconsequential part to focus on? ;-)


I was wondering the same thing LOL. I didn't even realize tab was on there till he made me reread it.
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Postby The Great Gambini » Thu Feb 16, 2006 6:45 pm

Wizzle wrote:
onnestabe wrote:
Redskins Win wrote:
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Isn't Tab already considered "diet"?
That ruined it for me :-t


wow...could you have picked a more inconsequential part to focus on? ;-)


I was wondering the same thing LOL. I didn't even realize tab was on there till he made me reread it.


Haha, ditto. Good joke, though.
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Postby skibrett15 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 6:49 pm

fresca is always diet, that much is certain.
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