The Ultimate Rejection Letter

[knapplc]

Herbert A. Millington
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson University
College Hill, MA 34109

Dear Professor Millington,

Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field
of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at
this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor
in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then.

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen

If it was real, it would be fun to know the reply.

[treat24]

Herbert A. Millington
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson University
College Hill, MA 34109

Dear Professor Millington,

Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field
of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at
this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor
in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then.

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen

If it was real, it would be fun to know the reply.

yeah it would!

[Karoz]

Each person finds their own way to deal with rejection.

Instead of becoming depressed or angry, he decided to take it in stride and make a joke out of it. This letter is obviously very sarcastic, and it is mocking the act of rejection committed by the employer. I found it hilarious, and as you stated, the response to this letter would probably be equally amusing.

[BGbootha]

Yeah I thought that was great. I would love to know what the reply was.

[sportsaddict]

If that's real I want to meet that guy

That's a pretty good way to get back at someone who rejected you. Would be funny if he actually showed up at his job that August to see the reaction of everyone.

[A Fleshner Fantasy]

That seems like a good idea for when a girl rejects a guy. Just be like, yeahhhh we're going to go on that date.

[knapplc]

That seems like a good idea for when a girl rejects a guy. Just be like, yeahhhh we're going to go on that date.

One of George's girlfriends did that to him on Seinfeld.

[A Fleshner Fantasy]

That seems like a good idea for when a girl rejects a guy. Just be like, yeahhhh we're going to go on that date.

One of George's girlfriends did that to him on Seinfeld.

Haha, I think I remember that. He couldn't break up beyond a reasonable doubt.

[Atog]

Hmmmmmmm

[moonhead]

rejection is met with a vengeance in my world.