Because you can't read a teleprompter with your eyes closed!
damn I fell out of me chair laughing. that hurt hit my chin on the computer table.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
Sitting together on a train was Obama, a Cajun from Cut Off, LA, a little old lady, and a young blonde girl with large breasts.
The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound of a loud slap..
When the train emerges from the tunnel, Obama has a bright red hand print on his cheek. No one speaks.
The old lady thinks: Obama must have groped the blonde in the dark, and she slapped him.
The blonde girl thinks: Obama must have tried to grope me in the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she slapped him.
Obama thinks: The Cajun must have groped the blonde in the dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead.
The Cajun thinks: I can't wait for another tunnel, so I can slap the crap out of Obama again.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
I became confused when I heard the word "Service" used with these agencies:
Internal Revenue 'Service' U.S. Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Cable TV 'Service' Civil 'Service' State, City, County & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service'
This is not what I thought 'Service' meant.
But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to 'Service' a few cows. BAM!!! It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those agencies are doing to us.
You are now as enlightened as I am.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
A brunette was standing on the railroad tracks jumping up and down saying 21,21,21,21. a blonde saw that and thought, gee that looks fun. So she got on the tracks and started up too. Jumping and saying 21, 21, 21, 21. along came a train behind them, and just before the train got to them the brunette jumps off the tracks letting the train hit the blonde. after the train passed, the brunette gets back on the tracks jumping up and down saying 22, 22, 22, 22.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
What is the best result from the Cash for Clunkers program?
Got rid of all those Obama bumper stickers.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
You order whatever you want and the person behind you pays for it.
You could think of government workers like teenagers. You pay them an allowance, but do you get any work out them? They eat the food, put their feet on the furniture and complain loudly whenever they are unhappy.
A logger lost his job and went out to look for a new one. He came across a logging company so he went inside to talk to the owner.
The owner said to the logger, "You need to have experience and be tough for this job."
The logger said, "I was once a logger and I am tough. Once, I cut a tree down and it fell on my arm, pinning it to the ground. So I cut my arm off, pulled it out from underneath the tree and sewed it back onto my body."
The owner said, "Wow, you are tough. You're hired!"
Throwing his arms up in front of him in excitement, the logger said...
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by calieigh » Thu Feb 04, 2010 6:19 am 
