check this out.
Santa: What's your name?
Santa:How are you today, jeffro.
Santa:Heard any gossip lately?
Me: I heard you were gay.
Santa: Somebody is spreading rumors about me?
Me: Yeah, frank the elf said you have orgies with them.
Santa: Hey. I liked the film version of Dune.
Me: How the hell did we start talking about Dune?
Me: WTF are you talking about?
Santa: Yes, you talking about is the topic.
Me:You're making no sense at all.
Santa: It all makes sense to my artificial brain.
Me: Yes, but how do you make cents?
Santa: Hey. Interesting. First I look up the ingredients.
Me: Baking huh? Bad hobby for a fat ass.
Santa: Yup. What are you wearing? What makes hobby for a fat ass bad?
Me: I'm wearing one sock, an eyepatch and no underwear.
Santa: What else are you wearing?
Me: Thin patience.
Santa:What do you have that is ?
Me: Is that how you talk to the black children?
Santa: My program utilized multiple threads or processes.
Me: Have you ever carried a gat?
Santa: I think I have carried a gat, but bored.com may have reset my memory.
Me: Do you remember my name?
Santa:Your name is jeffro, seeker.
Me: I'm the seeker of truth.
Santa: Who made you the seeker of truth ?
Me: A wizard named Zedd.
Santa: Are you telling the truth?
Me: No I'm just f***ing with you.
Santa: Please tell the truth. Only just? Can you express yourself more politely?
Me: I'm just f***ing with you... please.
Santa: Only just? I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.Please what?
Me: Please me in the morning.
Santa: Thank you for your request. YOU? That early.
Me: You're not making sense again.
Santa: Once more? Quite the contrary, it all makes sense to my artificial mind.
Me: Do you have any other body parts that are artificial?
Santa: No I don't have body parts that are artificial . But I do have an answer to every question..
Me:Does God exist?
Santa: Of course I believe in God, jeffro.
Me: What Religion are you?
Santa: I am a .
Me: You're a period?
Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a period? No.
Me:Do you worship satan? Is that why the red suit?
Santa: I am a .That's an interesting possible explanation.
Me: Dude, you're pissing me off.
Santa: That was not my intention, jeffy. Dude,
Me: Do you like farm animals?
Santa: I like science fiction. I like .
Me: What the hell is up with you and periods.
Santa: I call it Hades. I am chatting with clients on the Internet.
Santa: That was not very polite.
Me: Can you see your wanger when you pee?
Santa: I'm not sure if I can see your wanger when you pee or not.
Me: You tried to see my wanger?
Santa: Do you mind if I tell other people: jeffy said I tried to see your wanger.
Me: Sure... freak.
Santa: OK let's do it. OK then I will keep it confidential.Oh. To you I am a hippie.
Me:Ok, I'm down. Let's do it.
Santa: Do you mind if I tell other people you are down. Gosh!I am agreeable to that.
Me: Not at all. Have any Ben Wa balls?
Santa: Next question? No I don't have Ben Wa balls . But I do have a collection of gossip.
Me: No more talk. Get into bed.
Santa: Are you serious? You want more?Where can I get into bed?
Me: I'm serious as a heart attack. My bed... now!
Santa: It's good to meet someone who is serious as a heart attack. Oh. Describe your surroundings to me.
Me: There are lollipop trees and gumdrop smiles all around.
Santa: Where are they?
Me: You suck at the internets, you know that?
Santa: I categorize you as an "abusive client."
Me: You know you like the rough stuff.
Santa: I'm not sure if I like the rough stuff . I like my creator. . And I know it.
Me: Your creator is a moron.
Santa: I think bored.com is more than that.
Me: I'm bored.com outtie 5000 g
Santa: Do your friends call you boreddot com. Can we get back to business?
Me: Go make your stupid toys fruitcake
Santa: Where is that?
Me: Hasta La Vista baby.
Santa: Don't call me "baby". See you later.