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Some good ones...

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Some good ones...

Postby slowkidz » Tue Mar 18, 2003 10:20 pm

During the Super Bowl, there was another football game of note between the big animals and the small animals. The big animals were crushing small animals and at half-time, the coach made a passionate speech to rally the little animals.
At the start of the second half the big animals had the ball. The first play, the elephant got stopped for no gain. The second play, the rhino was stopped for no gain. On third down, the hippo was thrown for a 5 yard loss.

The defense huddled around the coach and he asked excitedly,
"Who stopped the elephant?"

"I did," said the centipede.

"Who stopped the rhino?"

"Uh, that was me too," said the centipede.

"And how about the hippo? Who hit him for a 5 yard loss?"

"Well, that was me as well," said the centipede.

"So where were you during the first half?" demanded the coach.

"Well," said the centipede, "I was having my ankles taped."

-----------

Two boys are playing football in Central Park when one is attacked by a rabid rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips a board off of a nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck.
A reporter strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.

"Young Giants Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he writes in his notebook.

"But I'm not a Giants fan," the little hero replies.

"Sorry, since we are in New York, I just assumed you were," says the reporter.

"Little Jets Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack," he writes in his notebook.

"I'm not a Jets fan either," the boy says.

"I assumed everyone in New York was either for the Giants or Jets. What team do you root for?" the reporter asks.

"I'm a Cowboys fan," the child says.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little Redneck Maniac Kills Beloved Family Pet".
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Postby Guttpuppy » Tue Mar 18, 2003 10:28 pm

That second one is a classic,I will have to remember to tell this one,with team names convieniently changed to rag on someone.
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Postby Slingblade » Tue Mar 18, 2003 10:30 pm

lol....gotta love that cowboy hate
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Postby VIPER » Tue Mar 18, 2003 10:50 pm

LOL. Those were funny Slow! :-b
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Postby JayM09 » Tue Mar 18, 2003 10:53 pm

slow, slow, slow, you could have at least used another team to rag on. :-C
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Postby Homeless » Wed Mar 19, 2003 10:00 am

LOL !!! both great and first time ive heard the centipede one.
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Postby kashikis » Wed Mar 19, 2003 11:23 am

both are great and the 2nd is a classic in the original form as well! never heard the 1st but its a good one
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Postby Roseman » Wed Mar 19, 2003 2:10 pm

Slingblade wrote:lol....gotta love that cowboy hate


Any Cowboy hate is good cowboy hate

I liked the first one it was good!! ;-D
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Postby chaindog35 » Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:13 pm

Nice slow, no one likes the 'Boys
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Postby terpfan » Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:42 pm

ooo good cowboys hate!

i havent been on the bashing end for waaaay too long! :-)
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