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If men ruled...

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If men ruled...

Postby Petey » Tue Mar 25, 2003 3:08 pm

Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to 'I love you.'

• Hallmark would make 'Sorry, what was your name again?' cards.

• When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she would appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during half-time.

• Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack on the bum would pretty much do it.

• Birth control could come in ale or lager.

• The funniest guy in the office would get to be the big boss.

• 'Sorry I'm late, I got hammered last night,' would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness.

• It'd be considered harmless fun to gather 30 friends, put on horned helmets, and go pillage a nearby town.

• Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the 'public ugliness' ordinance.

• Tanks would be far easier to rent.

• Instead of beer belly, you'd get 'beer biceps'.

• Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, 'You're No. 1.'

• Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29.

• Cops would be broadcast live and you could phone in advice to the pursuing cops. Or to the crooks.

• The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and eat the losers.

• The only show opposite Friday Night Football would be Friday Night Football from a Different Camera Angle.

• It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car, as long as you returned it the following day with a full tank of petrol.

• Every man would get four real 'Get Out of Jail Free' cards per year.

• When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-alec answer you responded with would actually reduce your fine, as in:

Cop: `You know how fast you were going?'

You: 'All I know is that I was spilling my beer all over the place.'

Cop: 'Nice one. That's $10 off.'
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Postby fntsyrookie » Tue Mar 25, 2003 3:28 pm

That last one is great!!!
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Postby kashikis » Tue Mar 25, 2003 3:54 pm

lmao

definately one of the best lists so far they are all great!!!
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Postby slowkidz » Tue Mar 25, 2003 6:50 pm

LOL :-B
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Postby Homeless » Tue Mar 25, 2003 8:15 pm

Haha those are great ;-D
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Postby hayesb26 » Tue Mar 25, 2003 8:56 pm

haha those are great!!! ;-D
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Postby JayM09 » Tue Mar 25, 2003 11:00 pm

another good one petey. ;-D
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Re: If men ruled...

Postby kashikis » Wed Mar 26, 2003 10:27 am

petey wrote:It'd be considered harmless fun to gather 30 friends, put on horned helmets, and go pillage a nearby town.


at first i couldnt pick a fav but after reading it again i love this one LOL :-D

the mental picture is priceless
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Postby cwebb » Wed Mar 26, 2003 1:59 pm

But why would anyone want to engage if men ruled? ;-)
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Postby Dazedncnfz » Thu Mar 27, 2003 1:01 pm

JayM09 wrote:another good one petey. ;-D


agreed!..yet another good one!...."• Hallmark would make 'Sorry, what was your name again?' cards"....LMAO!!!
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