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HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

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HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

Postby Slingblade » Tue Apr 01, 2003 5:42 pm

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: (new 2003 version)

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
10. She is not a #### - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
12. She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS
6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
10.He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED
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Postby Homeless » Tue Apr 01, 2003 7:09 pm

5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.


theyre the best kind of girls !! ;-D
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Postby hayesb26 » Tue Apr 01, 2003 10:15 pm

hahaha nice post!! ;-D
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Postby kashikis » Wed Apr 02, 2003 8:06 am

good stuff there Sling!

lol funny
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Postby fntsyrookie » Wed Apr 02, 2003 8:40 am

lol. Nice post Slingy. Some good stuff.
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Re: HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

Postby DUKE » Wed Apr 02, 2003 9:57 am

Slingblade wrote: She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.


No those are the best kind Homey. Or maybe a combo of the two ;-D
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Postby Indy Dragons » Wed Apr 02, 2003 12:11 pm

I really think #3 is the best for me, because I'm a #10 (in the men's list).


Good stuff.
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Postby cwebb » Wed Apr 02, 2003 12:50 pm

:-D

I'm extremely caucasian, too, dancefloors just aren't as attractive as the seats at the bar!
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Postby Roseman » Wed Apr 02, 2003 12:59 pm

Thanks for the update Sling I find myself reverting to the non-politically correct versions on several occasions due to my lack of education in this matter. I am now a better person for having heard this. @#$% that political correctness is for HR people and guidance counsellors

Funny post though keep'em coming guys!!! I need the humour to get through yet another day at work!!!
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Re: HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

Postby terpfan » Fri Apr 04, 2003 10:59 pm

Slingblade wrote:2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.


LMAO!!!
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