What in the name of Fieldturf is going on with NFL referees?
Suddenly, they are like the cast of "Friends." They will not shut up, are at once endearing, chatty, annoying, sexy and, so far this season, get way too much TV time.
Did the Fool say NFL refs are sexy?
I am told there is a Web site of admirers who have taken an almost stalker-like interest in muscular ref Ed Hochuli. No, I did not check this out and I do not want to know anything more about it.
I turn to the great "Monday Morning Quarterback" for a coherent take on veteran ref Johnny Grier. The MMQ watched the Denver-San Diego game -- for which I am truly sorry -- and was stunned by the actions of "Chandler" Grier.
"This game was overshadowed by one of those classic performances by the most dominant force in professional football today, referee Johnny Grier. He did it all -- personal fouls, extended time in the replay porno booth, the patented 'call a penalty and then wave it off' move just to clock some additional TV face time. He even called defensive holding on a running play. It's a miracle this game isn't still going on."
Other refs have been as bad. They prance, wave their arms dramatically, smile for the camera, explain too much and even seem to intentionally make calls that need explanation.
I know the league has told them to explain more this season. Guess what? We don't want to hear them. We want to bitch at them, blame them for losses and wonder what in the motherbleepin' world they were thinking on that call.
On Monday night, the refs hosed the Redskins, pretty much gave the game to Dallas. That's what we want to know about NFL refs -- that they suck.
The Chargers' horrendous play the last seven seasons? It's the refs, they never get any calls. Raider Nation has voodoo dolls of every man who's ever donned the black-and-white stripes.
Maybe they should be full time. Maybe they should all have sitcoms.
Surely, Ed Hochuli will be a guest star on "Joey" soon enough.