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Lawyers

Postby slowkidz » Fri Jul 11, 2003 1:58 pm

Ya...figgered it was time to start the joke bashing again...so here it goes....hehehe

The Post Office just recalled their latest stamps. They had pictures of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer? She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, and then he lies on the other.

How many lawyer jokes are there? Only three. The rest are true stories.

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can you afford?

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to climb the ladder, one to shake it, and one to sue the ladder company.

If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could save only one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue.

What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers? Skeet.

What do you call a lawyer gone bad? Senator.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50? Your honor.

What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? His partners.

What does a lawyer use for birth control? His personality.

What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer? Nothing. There are some
things a pig won't do.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? The lawyer gets
frequent flyer miles.

What's another difference between a lawyer and a vulture? Removable wing
tips.

What do you get if you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.
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Re: Lawyers

Postby kashikis » Fri Jul 11, 2003 3:18 pm

Slowkidz wrote:What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers? Skeet.


definately my fav one lol ;-D
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What the hell.... is goin' on.... in the NFL?!
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Postby Dazedncnfz » Fri Jul 11, 2003 3:28 pm

good stuff slow! ;-D
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T.S. - "You don't have to love me, but you will [b]RESPECT[/b] me"
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Postby Madison » Fri Jul 11, 2003 3:47 pm

Good one Slow!
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Postby Homeless » Fri Jul 11, 2003 4:19 pm

What do you get if you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.


HAHA great !
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Postby terpfan » Fri Jul 11, 2003 7:18 pm

lol poor lawyers...
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Postby DieHardCubbie » Fri Jul 11, 2003 11:35 pm

LMAO Slow... ;-D
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Postby Slingblade » Sat Jul 12, 2003 1:24 am

there you go making fun of my career path :-t
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Postby terpfan » Sat Jul 12, 2003 5:39 am

Slingblade wrote:there you go making fun of my career path :-t

haha poor slingy...
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Postby cwebb » Sun Jul 13, 2003 6:30 am

Poor Chelsea hahaha
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